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Hey everyone!
If you've added me and would like me to add you back, comment here :) My journal is not 100% friends only, but commenting here will help me feel a little better about adding you back, if that makes sense.
Thanks! <3
I planned out a whole post the other week and got interrupted/never came back.
Right now though, I'm just pissed about not getting a raise at work, but them countering with giving me more work, and then me finding out the fuck up that got hired after me is making more than me (because guess what! He's a man!), and I'm just...really fucking depressed right now.
Right now though, I'm just pissed about not getting a raise at work, but them countering with giving me more work, and then me finding out the fuck up that got hired after me is making more than me (because guess what! He's a man!), and I'm just...really fucking depressed right now.
Whoops I did it again
Feb. 24th, 2022 04:25 pmHonestly can't seem to remember to come back here to journal but in all fairness, things have been (mostly) okay. Although this past week was the exception and you'd THINK I'd remember to journal when things get hectic but IDK.
Anyway, on Friday of last week I joked about going to Paris. I had made plans a while back to go with a friend, but between the plague and finances, we put it out a couple years and then kind of stopped talking about it. But the joke made me think about it and I checked tickets and they're *insanely* low for the time frame I looked at them. I immediately texted my friend, who was like 'oh wow', and I asked if she seriously still wanted to go, which she said yes to, and then it was like "Courtney, are we really going to Paris?!"
So yeah. We just have to renew our passports, buy our tickets, and reserve an AirBNB. One thing at a time but I'll be in Paris next year!!!
However, that excitement was immediately nerfed by the water bill I received the next day. $229. Needless to say, I did not use that much water, and after freaking out and calming down with the help of everyone who said "that's not normal", and a little fighting with the city, I called today and they told me my new balance was $57.95. Although that wasn't reflected on their website, that is what I paid and hopefully I won't hear anymore about that disaster.
Also went to the lady doctor for my yearly, but mainly because I'm having two-week cycles on a birth control that's supposed to (or usually) stops it. Gyno didn't seem concerned, but ordered an ultrasound *just* in case and we'll go from there, and if it's nothing, she'll prescribe some hormones, I believe.
Then comes the fucking dog next door who barks at all hours and it looks like its owners just leave it outside when it's barely 40 degrees (F). I called animal control but no one answered, left a message, they unfortunately called back while I was in a meeting and did NOT leave a message, so I called again, but again no answer. I left another message, but they have not called back. So idk what to do.
So that's been my week in a nutshell. Therapy got cancelled today, which *sucked* because I had a lot to get off my chest, so I guess that's why I'm here! I also wanted to talk to him about the Inner Child book I'm reading. I'd like to go through some of it with him and see what he has to say but AGH.
I also keep thinking today is Friday?!
Anyway, on Friday of last week I joked about going to Paris. I had made plans a while back to go with a friend, but between the plague and finances, we put it out a couple years and then kind of stopped talking about it. But the joke made me think about it and I checked tickets and they're *insanely* low for the time frame I looked at them. I immediately texted my friend, who was like 'oh wow', and I asked if she seriously still wanted to go, which she said yes to, and then it was like "Courtney, are we really going to Paris?!"
So yeah. We just have to renew our passports, buy our tickets, and reserve an AirBNB. One thing at a time but I'll be in Paris next year!!!
However, that excitement was immediately nerfed by the water bill I received the next day. $229. Needless to say, I did not use that much water, and after freaking out and calming down with the help of everyone who said "that's not normal", and a little fighting with the city, I called today and they told me my new balance was $57.95. Although that wasn't reflected on their website, that is what I paid and hopefully I won't hear anymore about that disaster.
Also went to the lady doctor for my yearly, but mainly because I'm having two-week cycles on a birth control that's supposed to (or usually) stops it. Gyno didn't seem concerned, but ordered an ultrasound *just* in case and we'll go from there, and if it's nothing, she'll prescribe some hormones, I believe.
Then comes the fucking dog next door who barks at all hours and it looks like its owners just leave it outside when it's barely 40 degrees (F). I called animal control but no one answered, left a message, they unfortunately called back while I was in a meeting and did NOT leave a message, so I called again, but again no answer. I left another message, but they have not called back. So idk what to do.
So that's been my week in a nutshell. Therapy got cancelled today, which *sucked* because I had a lot to get off my chest, so I guess that's why I'm here! I also wanted to talk to him about the Inner Child book I'm reading. I'd like to go through some of it with him and see what he has to say but AGH.
I also keep thinking today is Friday?!
So I meant to be more diligent with posting about things and immediately dropped the ball. To be fair, it's not a habit to post/journal, so that's on me.
This week was a solid lesson in disappointment. So I read a book titled "Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents", basically about people who were raised by shitty parents who were not emotionally mature enough to raise children. To put it bluntly. I was raised by a narcissist father and...honestly don't know what to call my mom, but both of them are EI parents for sure.
Anyway, to make a long story short - the unfortunate way to heal and deal with being raised by EI parents is to basically stop engaging with them. Start drawing back, stop trying to get them to be what you want (and you need to have accepted that they won't change unless THEY make that choice, which I have), and for lack of a better way of putting it: basically limit your exposure to them. Unfortunately for me, I go to their house to do my laundry, and this past Sunday, I dropped the *ball*. I immediately sat with my dad to watch the movie he had, and when we went to lunch (all three of us), I was chatting them UP. Then my mom and I ran errands and made a King Cake, and I couldn't stop telling her all about the plot of FFX because I had the soundtrack playing for background music.
It's like watching a car wreck and not being able to do anything to stop it. AGH.
So I discussed this with my parents today and he suggested I start finding ways to not go over and do my laundry and I immediately got uncomfortable and started feeling guilty and we discovered today that I'm *still* incredibly dependent on them and care way too much about possibly hurting their feelings. But, the better strategy we decided on, even if it's the more expensive route, is for me to get my own machines. A laundromat would be cheaper, but I honestly hate devoting any more time than necessary to laundry. If I could just yeet my clothes in my own machines, I'd feel so much better than having to spend ALL DAY at my parents' house.
I hate how much effort it takes to heal yourself. Especially when you didn't even DO this to yourself, someone else did. I wish it were just super easy to turn everything around and make it all better.
But honestly, the main reason I wanted to post tonight was because something GOOD happened today. Today was stressful because last night my neighbor's dog was outside ALL NIGHT BARKING. I slept *terribly*, and I'm still anxious about dealing with that in the future. Though if it happens tonight, I have every right to call animal patrol and/or the cops because it's going below freezing. Hopefully I don't have to do that.
However, a former friend reached out and friended me on Facebook. Which may seem inconsequential to some, but...this really doesn't happen to me very often. I was just thinking earlier today how...sad it was that people don't seem to remember me, that I don't really stick out in their minds, and if we lose connection, that's probably the end of it. It's honestly why *I* don't go out of my way to refriend people. I feel like...I don't matter to them. Truthfully, I have no idea, but honestly, based on my past posts and honestly, what I said up above, are you shocked that my self-esteem is so shitty?
It just made me feel good and that maybe there is hope for the people I've unintentionally written out of my life. I just have to be patient and look for the opportunities if they present themselves to me.
This was a good post :)
This week was a solid lesson in disappointment. So I read a book titled "Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents", basically about people who were raised by shitty parents who were not emotionally mature enough to raise children. To put it bluntly. I was raised by a narcissist father and...honestly don't know what to call my mom, but both of them are EI parents for sure.
Anyway, to make a long story short - the unfortunate way to heal and deal with being raised by EI parents is to basically stop engaging with them. Start drawing back, stop trying to get them to be what you want (and you need to have accepted that they won't change unless THEY make that choice, which I have), and for lack of a better way of putting it: basically limit your exposure to them. Unfortunately for me, I go to their house to do my laundry, and this past Sunday, I dropped the *ball*. I immediately sat with my dad to watch the movie he had, and when we went to lunch (all three of us), I was chatting them UP. Then my mom and I ran errands and made a King Cake, and I couldn't stop telling her all about the plot of FFX because I had the soundtrack playing for background music.
It's like watching a car wreck and not being able to do anything to stop it. AGH.
So I discussed this with my parents today and he suggested I start finding ways to not go over and do my laundry and I immediately got uncomfortable and started feeling guilty and we discovered today that I'm *still* incredibly dependent on them and care way too much about possibly hurting their feelings. But, the better strategy we decided on, even if it's the more expensive route, is for me to get my own machines. A laundromat would be cheaper, but I honestly hate devoting any more time than necessary to laundry. If I could just yeet my clothes in my own machines, I'd feel so much better than having to spend ALL DAY at my parents' house.
I hate how much effort it takes to heal yourself. Especially when you didn't even DO this to yourself, someone else did. I wish it were just super easy to turn everything around and make it all better.
But honestly, the main reason I wanted to post tonight was because something GOOD happened today. Today was stressful because last night my neighbor's dog was outside ALL NIGHT BARKING. I slept *terribly*, and I'm still anxious about dealing with that in the future. Though if it happens tonight, I have every right to call animal patrol and/or the cops because it's going below freezing. Hopefully I don't have to do that.
However, a former friend reached out and friended me on Facebook. Which may seem inconsequential to some, but...this really doesn't happen to me very often. I was just thinking earlier today how...sad it was that people don't seem to remember me, that I don't really stick out in their minds, and if we lose connection, that's probably the end of it. It's honestly why *I* don't go out of my way to refriend people. I feel like...I don't matter to them. Truthfully, I have no idea, but honestly, based on my past posts and honestly, what I said up above, are you shocked that my self-esteem is so shitty?
It just made me feel good and that maybe there is hope for the people I've unintentionally written out of my life. I just have to be patient and look for the opportunities if they present themselves to me.
This was a good post :)
I'm back! A Dinosaur's Story
Jan. 27th, 2022 06:32 pm(Sorry, couldn't resist with the title.)
Since I can't trust my memory these days, I guess I do need to start writing down things. It will probably help but I probably need to seriously contemplate why I don't like journaling without an audience. I think I've definitely grown since the last time I posted here, nah I know I have. Three years lol.
I know my inner monologue changes when I know someone is going to read what I'm going to say. I guess instead of being honest, I write what I think I need to say and what I think will interest people to hear and I can't really keep doing that. I have to be honest with myself and really pay attention to what I'm doing and thinking and feeling, and really focus on what kind of person I want to be.
This year I decided I'm ready to get a handle on my life - my wants, my dreams, desires - who I'm supposed to be, who I need to be, who I want to be. I don't want to go down the cliche road of "new year new me" or "this is MY year" but I really want that to be the case for me. I'm tired of feeling stuck and worthless and alone.
I still have so many hurdles ahead of me. Mainly like making new friends involves meeting new people :/ Not sure how to go about that one especially in a pandemic (yeah, I have the plague btw, thanks mom!)
Therapy is going well though. I'm lucky my high school buddy is in the business and was kind enough to take me on as a pro bono patient. I am very lucky. It was really hard not to feel like I manipulated him into it, but I think I've finally accepted that he was willing to help and my circumstances helped secure that for me.
I want to sit down and deconstruct my thoughts some more, probably in a more organized way. But this entry was just practice for next time.
Until next time.
Since I can't trust my memory these days, I guess I do need to start writing down things. It will probably help but I probably need to seriously contemplate why I don't like journaling without an audience. I think I've definitely grown since the last time I posted here, nah I know I have. Three years lol.
I know my inner monologue changes when I know someone is going to read what I'm going to say. I guess instead of being honest, I write what I think I need to say and what I think will interest people to hear and I can't really keep doing that. I have to be honest with myself and really pay attention to what I'm doing and thinking and feeling, and really focus on what kind of person I want to be.
This year I decided I'm ready to get a handle on my life - my wants, my dreams, desires - who I'm supposed to be, who I need to be, who I want to be. I don't want to go down the cliche road of "new year new me" or "this is MY year" but I really want that to be the case for me. I'm tired of feeling stuck and worthless and alone.
I still have so many hurdles ahead of me. Mainly like making new friends involves meeting new people :/ Not sure how to go about that one especially in a pandemic (yeah, I have the plague btw, thanks mom!)
Therapy is going well though. I'm lucky my high school buddy is in the business and was kind enough to take me on as a pro bono patient. I am very lucky. It was really hard not to feel like I manipulated him into it, but I think I've finally accepted that he was willing to help and my circumstances helped secure that for me.
I want to sit down and deconstruct my thoughts some more, probably in a more organized way. But this entry was just practice for next time.
Until next time.
(no subject)
Jul. 6th, 2019 10:13 amTwo days left to enter the giveaway. Make sure to register your entries here:
https://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/485fa7390/
<333
https://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/485fa7390/
<333
Contest :)
Jun. 30th, 2019 05:48 pmHere is the link to the contest for my book in case any of you are interested:
https://www.facebook.com/jnporetauthor/photos/a.256319398371603/346861619317380/?type=3&theater¬if_t=page_post_reaction¬if_id=1561931573240240
Please let me know if the link doesn't work :)
https://www.facebook.com/jnporetauthor/photos/a.256319398371603/346861619317380/?type=3&theater¬if_t=page_post_reaction¬if_id=1561931573240240
Please let me know if the link doesn't work :)
(no subject)
Jun. 18th, 2019 08:22 pmtoday i got asked about my book because someone is interested in reading but can't afford a copy. i really wish i could give copies to EVERYONE, which i mean, i could do but then i don't make money and have to spend it lololol
not the point.
the point is, i got to talk about it a little in detail and it really...made me feel good. i just wish i could feel that way about it all the time :/ and COULD ACTUALLY WRITE AND PUT A COHESIVE PLOT TOGETHER FOR THE SUBSEQUENT BOOKS.
Link is in my profile if you're interested in buying.
not the point.
the point is, i got to talk about it a little in detail and it really...made me feel good. i just wish i could feel that way about it all the time :/ and COULD ACTUALLY WRITE AND PUT A COHESIVE PLOT TOGETHER FOR THE SUBSEQUENT BOOKS.
Link is in my profile if you're interested in buying.
emotional music
Jun. 18th, 2019 07:32 amsometimes I hate how emotional music makes me, but I know this game hit me in a lot of ways that make me feel connected to it, and writing all the fics I've written has made it worse, but
THIS SONG, bro:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_EixYmTi8RE
all i want to do is cry when i hear it.
yay being an empath. not.
THIS SONG, bro:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_EixYmTi8RE
all i want to do is cry when i hear it.
yay being an empath. not.
Maybe fanfic was probably the best thing I could've done for myself. I come every day and just WRITE (though I did struggle last night lol, but ASIDE FROM THAT)..
I just wish I could channel that excitement into my novels. I know part of it is intimidation and nerves and frustration because I don't think my creation is good enough, and that fanfic is an easy way out because all the world building and stuff is done for me. I don't have to worry about that nonsense.
But I miss my babies. I miss my OCs and I want to see them grow into these characters I adore so much in my fics, who aren't mine.
It's conflicting.
I just wish I could channel that excitement into my novels. I know part of it is intimidation and nerves and frustration because I don't think my creation is good enough, and that fanfic is an easy way out because all the world building and stuff is done for me. I don't have to worry about that nonsense.
But I miss my babies. I miss my OCs and I want to see them grow into these characters I adore so much in my fics, who aren't mine.
It's conflicting.
So my newest FFXV fanfic has garnered a lot of interest which is both exciting and satisfying <3
But the best thing is that an artist commented on it like "i really want to draw them b/c of this fic" and literally??
THAT IS ALL I EVER WANTED.
To be fair, I'd love fanart/fanfic of my own original fiction/Lani, asjflasfjkls BUT! This is literally the next best thing and something I was still hoping for. She(?) posted the sketch last night and it's FREAKING BEAUTIFUL.
I'll link it later when i'm not on my work computer (it's not explicit, just really don't want that stuff on this machine lol). I cannot wait to see the finished result. I am so honored and flattered and it is SUCH a good feeling.
YAY.
But the best thing is that an artist commented on it like "i really want to draw them b/c of this fic" and literally??
THAT IS ALL I EVER WANTED.
To be fair, I'd love fanart/fanfic of my own original fiction/Lani, asjflasfjkls BUT! This is literally the next best thing and something I was still hoping for. She(?) posted the sketch last night and it's FREAKING BEAUTIFUL.
I'll link it later when i'm not on my work computer (it's not explicit, just really don't want that stuff on this machine lol). I cannot wait to see the finished result. I am so honored and flattered and it is SUCH a good feeling.
YAY.
(no subject)
May. 12th, 2019 08:54 pmI'm back from Colorado <333 Will try to make a post soon and catch up on posts soon lol
update kinda
May. 3rd, 2019 07:08 amThe doctor didn't seem too concerned (aside from the obvious kidney issues) - there were white cells in my urine still, so I still have some infection, whether it's the UTI or something new, we'll have to wait and see. She's culturing it to see. Hopefully it's nothing to be concerned about, she did prescribe some more antibiotics and pain meds just in case.
That being said, I stopped hurting in that spot about thirty-ish minutes before I got to the doctor's. But now I'm hurting in random places throughout my body, so maybe I'm just achy or something, idk.
TL;DR, my body is a jerk.
That being said, I stopped hurting in that spot about thirty-ish minutes before I got to the doctor's. But now I'm hurting in random places throughout my body, so maybe I'm just achy or something, idk.
TL;DR, my body is a jerk.
not againnnnn
May. 2nd, 2019 02:03 pmI leave for Colorado in two days and that's the good news.
The bad news is that my left backside started hurting this morning and has not relented. The good news in that, is that the pain has not gotten worse. At least, the day of the kidney stone, I was worse within an hour. So I don't think it's a stone, but I am worried it's my kidney.
I managed to snag an appointment with my doctor at three, so here's to hoping it's nothing serious. Or something treatable. I was petrified it was a stone, but it hasn't gotten worse, so I'm optimistic about that.
Cross your fingers for me <3
In other news, I dreamt about Sterling (where I'm planning to go visit) last night. It was night, I was driving around, but all the places I wanted to go were blocked off. So I headed home (the house where I used to live) but it was blocked too.
I'm sure THAT means something, so I hope to remember to sit down and look at some dream dictionaries later this evening. I'm curious.
My friend Kerrie is really excited to see me, she's been texting me today telling me she has a BBQ planned at her place on Sunday, but I'm not sure if I'll arrive early enough to attend. It makes me feel good that she wants to see me.
I hope this trip is worth it. I hope I'm not disappointed. I hope I get what I need from it.
The bad news is that my left backside started hurting this morning and has not relented. The good news in that, is that the pain has not gotten worse. At least, the day of the kidney stone, I was worse within an hour. So I don't think it's a stone, but I am worried it's my kidney.
I managed to snag an appointment with my doctor at three, so here's to hoping it's nothing serious. Or something treatable. I was petrified it was a stone, but it hasn't gotten worse, so I'm optimistic about that.
Cross your fingers for me <3
In other news, I dreamt about Sterling (where I'm planning to go visit) last night. It was night, I was driving around, but all the places I wanted to go were blocked off. So I headed home (the house where I used to live) but it was blocked too.
I'm sure THAT means something, so I hope to remember to sit down and look at some dream dictionaries later this evening. I'm curious.
My friend Kerrie is really excited to see me, she's been texting me today telling me she has a BBQ planned at her place on Sunday, but I'm not sure if I'll arrive early enough to attend. It makes me feel good that she wants to see me.
I hope this trip is worth it. I hope I'm not disappointed. I hope I get what I need from it.
at this point, I really don't know what's going on with my body anymore. when I wake up in the morning, I feel fine, for the most part, but yesterday, as the day wore on, the more I had to walk around (I have to get up a lot to go to the printer, and the bathroom is pretty far away), the more my side began to hurt.
i left early because by around 1:30, i was really sore. i haven't felt any pressure like i did on monday, since monday after they gave me the shot. i have no idea if i still have the stone or not because i feel like the pain would be fairly present in my side and not only exacerbated by walking???
so i really don't know what's going on. i think i'll call the doctor tomorrow and ask for an opinion because I don't want to assume I passed it with next to NO pain based on all the horror stories I've heard, but I just don't understand why i'm not hurting the same. especially when I can only take one of my pain meds (the other is hydrocodone/Vicodin and makes me drowsy, so I can't take it before work), so I feel like I SHOULD be hurting???
I hate not knowing what's going on.
i left early because by around 1:30, i was really sore. i haven't felt any pressure like i did on monday, since monday after they gave me the shot. i have no idea if i still have the stone or not because i feel like the pain would be fairly present in my side and not only exacerbated by walking???
so i really don't know what's going on. i think i'll call the doctor tomorrow and ask for an opinion because I don't want to assume I passed it with next to NO pain based on all the horror stories I've heard, but I just don't understand why i'm not hurting the same. especially when I can only take one of my pain meds (the other is hydrocodone/Vicodin and makes me drowsy, so I can't take it before work), so I feel like I SHOULD be hurting???
I hate not knowing what's going on.
tiny update
Apr. 23rd, 2019 07:54 amstill have the stone. coming to work yesterday sucked, but the lady who handles my report when I'm out wasn't going to be here, so I had no choice, really.
spent the entire weekend sleeping and throwing everything up. it sucks when you throw up for reasons other than a stomach bug.
i left work early and went to my doctor. she said based on what i told her, it sounds like the stone is moving and hopefully i'll pass it soon but there's no way to really say. they gave me a shot for my pain (which helped, can i get one every day???) and i spent the rest of the evening at home.
i should mention, i literally did not sleep sunday night into monday. i dozed for a couple hours til before midnight and i started hurting/feeling pressure that i couldn't ignore or do anything about. i literally was awake until 5am and then i just got up and got ready for the day.
i feel better than i have since this started today, but i'm super nauseous this morning and really don't want to be here, but my vacation to colorado is less than two weeks away and i can't use all my PTO on this freaking stone. :(
spent the entire weekend sleeping and throwing everything up. it sucks when you throw up for reasons other than a stomach bug.
i left work early and went to my doctor. she said based on what i told her, it sounds like the stone is moving and hopefully i'll pass it soon but there's no way to really say. they gave me a shot for my pain (which helped, can i get one every day???) and i spent the rest of the evening at home.
i should mention, i literally did not sleep sunday night into monday. i dozed for a couple hours til before midnight and i started hurting/feeling pressure that i couldn't ignore or do anything about. i literally was awake until 5am and then i just got up and got ready for the day.
i feel better than i have since this started today, but i'm super nauseous this morning and really don't want to be here, but my vacation to colorado is less than two weeks away and i can't use all my PTO on this freaking stone. :(
lakjfklasjlsajf
Apr. 4th, 2019 08:45 pmI have not been around, so sorry. I have a lot of catching up to do, don't know when I'll get to it.
It's been crazy busy at work due to a new rollout for a payment system that of course didn't go well on its first week, so we've been trying to catch up on shit. This, coming off hurting my back by STRETCHING this weekend, only to slide right into a wannabe stomach virus that didn't quite become a virus, but it still made me feel like absolute shit. It's been hectic at work and I had to call in yesterday and leave early today.
It's hard not to let this shit get to me, but until P gets her shit together, work hasn't been as enjoyable as it was. And she won't get her shit together, so I'm struggling to just ignore it.
I'm just bitchy and cranky after a very long week. Glad tomorrow is Friday for SURE.
It's been crazy busy at work due to a new rollout for a payment system that of course didn't go well on its first week, so we've been trying to catch up on shit. This, coming off hurting my back by STRETCHING this weekend, only to slide right into a wannabe stomach virus that didn't quite become a virus, but it still made me feel like absolute shit. It's been hectic at work and I had to call in yesterday and leave early today.
It's hard not to let this shit get to me, but until P gets her shit together, work hasn't been as enjoyable as it was. And she won't get her shit together, so I'm struggling to just ignore it.
I'm just bitchy and cranky after a very long week. Glad tomorrow is Friday for SURE.
We're so slow at work that I've spent most of my time on Pinterest today. A site I almost have rarely used (only have one because my sister made me lol), and now I have updated boards and stuff.
I feel productive. I wish I had money to buy ALL the patterns I've found for cross-stitch ideas. Plenty of free stuff out there, but ehhh.
That being said, today feels like Friday and I'm aggravated that it isn't :|
I feel productive. I wish I had money to buy ALL the patterns I've found for cross-stitch ideas. Plenty of free stuff out there, but ehhh.
That being said, today feels like Friday and I'm aggravated that it isn't :|
Sweet but Psycho
Mar. 25th, 2019 03:03 pmSo I'm super stuck on this new song "Sweet by Psycho" by Ava Max, but I've actually been met with a LOT of resistance when I tell people I'm into it. Granted, I tend not to jump headfirst into the newest pop trends, but when there's nothing on Sirius and you check the Top 40 channel, and what do you know, you like the song, what can you do??
Most people have been like "omg, it's just so much like Lady Gaga". Like...okay? What's wrong with that? I still don't really hear it. I KIND of catch the chord progressions and hear the similarities, but even still, as a Gaga fan, I'm still like ???? about the comparison. Maybe I'm brain farting majorly, but I seriously don't hear it as something obvious.
IDK. I like the song lol.
Most people have been like "omg, it's just so much like Lady Gaga". Like...okay? What's wrong with that? I still don't really hear it. I KIND of catch the chord progressions and hear the similarities, but even still, as a Gaga fan, I'm still like ???? about the comparison. Maybe I'm brain farting majorly, but I seriously don't hear it as something obvious.
IDK. I like the song lol.
russian doll
Mar. 21st, 2019 02:41 pmwatched and finished Russian Doll in one day. Eight thirty minute episodes? Great idea. I felt so accomplished finishing that show in one day lol
It was REALLY good. Very insightful and creative and wow. Idk how they'll do another season, unless it's another arc for another set of characters. I feel like Nadia and Alan's story is through, so idk if this was a one season thing or what.
also started American Gods last night, but the cable box was not cooperating. hope to try again tonight. finished the first episode and part of the second before i got fed up with trying lol
It's WEIRD but intriguing enough to continue.
Guess maybe I'll start Umbrella Academy tomorrow??? I need to watch the new Queer Eye too, but I want to watch that at home where I can sob in peace lololololol
It was REALLY good. Very insightful and creative and wow. Idk how they'll do another season, unless it's another arc for another set of characters. I feel like Nadia and Alan's story is through, so idk if this was a one season thing or what.
also started American Gods last night, but the cable box was not cooperating. hope to try again tonight. finished the first episode and part of the second before i got fed up with trying lol
It's WEIRD but intriguing enough to continue.
Guess maybe I'll start Umbrella Academy tomorrow??? I need to watch the new Queer Eye too, but I want to watch that at home where I can sob in peace lololololol
TV and stuff
Mar. 21st, 2019 08:12 amSo I finally finished watching Lucifer, courtesy of ![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
missanthropicprinciple, not a terrible show. Flawed in its execution, but overall, it kept me watching till the end. I wish I could leave better reviews, because I really have stuff to say. Like, the writing was inconsistent, they'd bring up really intense plot points, only to have the next episode be a filler. Season three, although good in spots, was probably the worst of the bunch, random flashback episodes that served no purpose other than to give backstory that really wasn't crucial to anything but...a miniscule amount of character development, that by this point in the series, seemed out of place.
So, the writing gets like...a 5/10.
Characters? Much better, many were likable, a couple were bad, a few got better than when they were first introduced. Hated Dan when he first showed up, but by season three, I was like aw, yay, Dan! Like, almost every character was likable and redeemable.
But the villains sucked. I mean, what can you do with them, when the protagonist of the show IS the main villain in all of "creation", you know? I've never read the source material for this show, which I feel like I should do to be more knowledgable in my critique, but this is just how I feel viewing the show from this ignorant standpoint.
But to tie back to the inconsistent writing, is the whole central point of Lucifer/Chloe. So much building up to the OMG are they going to get together, only to have episodes in between those crucial moments that act like there has either a) been no growth, or b) like none of those crucial moments even happened. One could argue that Chloe is being professional and sticking to her job, but Lucifer is the big kid who you would think, wouldn't let those crucial moments be forgotten.
And then not to mention the random Pierce arc in Season Three. That was infuriating.
Tl;dr, LOVED the show, but it is very very chock full of inconsistent writing and issues. I'm not surprised it was cancelled. I sincerely hope Netflix does a great job of reviving it and fixing that writing flaw.
I want to revisit this and talk more about the characters, but I had to get the writing issues off my chest lololol
Back to work.
missanthropicprinciple, not a terrible show. Flawed in its execution, but overall, it kept me watching till the end. I wish I could leave better reviews, because I really have stuff to say. Like, the writing was inconsistent, they'd bring up really intense plot points, only to have the next episode be a filler. Season three, although good in spots, was probably the worst of the bunch, random flashback episodes that served no purpose other than to give backstory that really wasn't crucial to anything but...a miniscule amount of character development, that by this point in the series, seemed out of place.So, the writing gets like...a 5/10.
Characters? Much better, many were likable, a couple were bad, a few got better than when they were first introduced. Hated Dan when he first showed up, but by season three, I was like aw, yay, Dan! Like, almost every character was likable and redeemable.
But the villains sucked. I mean, what can you do with them, when the protagonist of the show IS the main villain in all of "creation", you know? I've never read the source material for this show, which I feel like I should do to be more knowledgable in my critique, but this is just how I feel viewing the show from this ignorant standpoint.
But to tie back to the inconsistent writing, is the whole central point of Lucifer/Chloe. So much building up to the OMG are they going to get together, only to have episodes in between those crucial moments that act like there has either a) been no growth, or b) like none of those crucial moments even happened. One could argue that Chloe is being professional and sticking to her job, but Lucifer is the big kid who you would think, wouldn't let those crucial moments be forgotten.
And then not to mention the random Pierce arc in Season Three. That was infuriating.
Tl;dr, LOVED the show, but it is very very chock full of inconsistent writing and issues. I'm not surprised it was cancelled. I sincerely hope Netflix does a great job of reviving it and fixing that writing flaw.
I want to revisit this and talk more about the characters, but I had to get the writing issues off my chest lololol
Back to work.
